New Year Blues: Feeling That Crinkled Crumpled Crushed Feeling After “It” Drops
A note on defrosting despair
Feeling blue?
Ever feel blah after the ball drops? How about when an unexpected shoe of news kicks you in the throat and you’re left there completely speechless? Crushed.
Out of the blue, uninvited “It” storms happen all the time. That’s life. Although some are systematically constructed with a corporate flair to create more pain and profit I digress.
I always felt the constipatory (constipation + participatory) holiday season do a number on my fragile highly sensitive soul. I’m an empath. Introvert. Spiritually surveilling anything and everything that crosses my soul's path. I mourn those we lost. Mourn the state of the union. Mourn the days when I forgot to send the text or do the thing for the thing because it’s human to forget.
Here’s where I’m at right now:
A bit weathered, shattered, and cracked. And this feels abrupt because we were in our comfort zone. Our happy place. Content within the confines of certainty, consistency, and complacency. The coming days and months feel sharper. Deeper I explored my mood, I was left asking: Are we going to be okay? Being tossed into an ice bucket of new faces, tools, and routines shocks your system at first. You can let change and transformation drown you in fear or despair. Or breathe a sigh of relief and allow yourself to see yourself and others waking up.
We desperately need change.
An act of kind courage to trust ourselves with our unique gift on this planet. Your existence is unique enough. You and me, we are the universe. Unbridled and unadulterated (for the most part at our core) to choose the path of least resistance and most curiosity. Do different. Unsung underdog vibes.
Truth is.
Commiserating on broken promises, missed opportunities, or the sudden upheaval of your entire paradigm well it’s just the best version of yourself ( your future self ) thawing the ice castle your past self built and the present you (the one that’s reading this) is doing everything you can to maintain the status quo because it’s easier to be a sycophant than it is to be a nonconformist when change feels edgy, hard, and dark. I get it. But it’s time to remember why you’re here. Turn over a new leaf and just allow the light of love to crack the veneer that’s been hiding your veracity.
Unapologetically.
I’m Bernard.
I put my entire business of color therapy on ice since the pandemic hit. Hard. Now after a 3 year hiatus, I’m ready to crack and defrost this cold self-inflicted cacoon and get back into writing, designing new color oracle cards, and giving more to the people of Earth.
My word/affirmation for this year is:
Chroma Mysticka
It simply means where purity of color meets creative lifeforce.
It’s a way of being and living so that we can appreciate the ordinary but not be too afraid to evolve things into the extraordinary. And my writing will showcase and explore what this means in a variety of ways. So thank you for being here and joining me in my musings. Oh, what magic and mystery this is going to be!